Okay, quick note. The car story lingers.
Apparently, Mom, who doesn't remember what day or season it is, fully remembers that:
1. Her car is gone
2. I took it. (Well, that's how it is in her mind anyway!)
Today she told my sister, "That Beckie!! She TOOK my car." Apparently she also said if it's not back by Friday, she's calling the police! I guess my best hope is she doesn't recall when Friday gets here.
In times like this I look often look to find a quote for inspiration. I figure if someone already said it and someone else took the time to record it, it must be alright for me to repeat it! So today, I say a great big thank you, to W. Clement Stone for having the words to remind me that I (we) are indeed doing the right thing, purely for the reason that it is indeed the right thing.
“Have the courage to say no. Have the courage to face the truth. Do the right thing because it is right. These are the magic keys to living your life with integrity.”
http://thinkexist.com/quotation/integrity_is_doing_the_right_thing-even_if_nobody/13808.html
Monday, March 22, 2010
Thursday, March 18, 2010
Is this a test of the emergency transport system?
I get home from work today and there's a message on my machine, from Mom.
"Beckie...I need you to bring me to the credit union, I need to deposit a check"
I stumble, crap...I have a sick kid on the couch, a kid at the sitter I haven't picked up yet, and one who needs to be picked up from a field trip in an hour. What do I do???
I know I need to call her back, but I know that I can't tell her that I can't do it... because we PROMISED her. That's when the seed gets planted in the back of my head...Is this a test?? Is she going to call ALL. THE. TIME. with little errands that NEED to be done, and so she can then prove to us that she NEEDS her car???
I quickly call the "baby" brother and ask if he can help her out, thankfully he can.
He calls me tonight, and thinks that indeed it was a test. They left the bank, she told him she needed a few groceries. "Some chips and some ginger ale." (He brought her chips on Monday and there were two bottles of Ginger ale in the fridge when I was there on Wednesday.) Hmm... so as he is putting away the ginger ale, he notices that in addition to the 2 bottles in the fridge, there are three under the sink. He puts the new soda in there and doesn't say a thing......
TIME.
WILL.
TELL.
We are strong.
This is right.
We love you Mom,
go ahead and keep testing us.
We will get you EVERYWHERE you need to go,
but we cannot let you drive.
"Beckie...I need you to bring me to the credit union, I need to deposit a check"
I stumble, crap...I have a sick kid on the couch, a kid at the sitter I haven't picked up yet, and one who needs to be picked up from a field trip in an hour. What do I do???
I know I need to call her back, but I know that I can't tell her that I can't do it... because we PROMISED her. That's when the seed gets planted in the back of my head...Is this a test?? Is she going to call ALL. THE. TIME. with little errands that NEED to be done, and so she can then prove to us that she NEEDS her car???
I quickly call the "baby" brother and ask if he can help her out, thankfully he can.
He calls me tonight, and thinks that indeed it was a test. They left the bank, she told him she needed a few groceries. "Some chips and some ginger ale." (He brought her chips on Monday and there were two bottles of Ginger ale in the fridge when I was there on Wednesday.) Hmm... so as he is putting away the ginger ale, he notices that in addition to the 2 bottles in the fridge, there are three under the sink. He puts the new soda in there and doesn't say a thing......
TIME.
WILL.
TELL.
We are strong.
This is right.
We love you Mom,
go ahead and keep testing us.
We will get you EVERYWHERE you need to go,
but we cannot let you drive.
The very next day....
Chronologically.....
11:00- Call from biggest Bro- Since we had been the one's to intervene on the families be-half, he wanted to update me on a few things.... Seems he and his wife had gone to visit Mom later Tuesday night, just to make sure she was okay. She wasn't. She was very sad, tearful and at times angry. She couldn't understand why I ( yup ME!) did this to her. She made a comparison to having her legs cut off. OUCH....this is hard to take!
11:15 Call my Sista...CRYING!! Can she meet me at Mom's cuz I thinkI am scared to go alone. I really don't want to argue with Mom, and I can't stand hurting her like this.
11:20 Call Mom tell her I am on my way over, she sounds good. I ask if she's okay.
Mom: I guess I have to be, I don't really have a choice.
Me: (Speechless, then crying...) I love Mommy...A Lot!
Mom: (Crying now too... ) I know you do. I talked to Dad last night and thanked him that we raised such wonderful kids.
Me: (Smiling on the inside...)I talked to him too....I wonder if we were talking to him at the same time and he was thinking "Jesus Christ....I can't even hear when your both talking at the same time...
Mom: (Laughing...) He hears us you know
Me: Ohhhh I know!
11:25 Call Sista back. Tell her I think I want to have lunch alone with Mom. We are going to be okay.
Later....
Looking at the plows on the side of the road, she proclaims, in exasperation "Really???...Plows???...already???! It's barely the end of summer!" Catching the wide-eyed look on my face, she says "Uhh the beginning of fall????" Softly, I place my hand on her arm, and say "Mom, it's St Patrick's Day (we've talked about this a few times today...Mini mook was wearing his leprechaun hat and all...) It's only March...really just the end of winter."
I bring her home, she checks the mail (for the third time) and heads into the house. She turns and smiles and blows a kiss....I back out of the driveway and cry.
I lose my Mother a little bit everyday...and it SUCKS!
11:00- Call from biggest Bro- Since we had been the one's to intervene on the families be-half, he wanted to update me on a few things.... Seems he and his wife had gone to visit Mom later Tuesday night, just to make sure she was okay. She wasn't. She was very sad, tearful and at times angry. She couldn't understand why I ( yup ME!) did this to her. She made a comparison to having her legs cut off. OUCH....this is hard to take!
11:15 Call my Sista...CRYING!! Can she meet me at Mom's cuz I thinkI am scared to go alone. I really don't want to argue with Mom, and I can't stand hurting her like this.
11:20 Call Mom tell her I am on my way over, she sounds good. I ask if she's okay.
Mom: I guess I have to be, I don't really have a choice.
Me: (Speechless, then crying...) I love Mommy...A Lot!
Mom: (Crying now too... ) I know you do. I talked to Dad last night and thanked him that we raised such wonderful kids.
Me: (Smiling on the inside...)I talked to him too....I wonder if we were talking to him at the same time and he was thinking "Jesus Christ....I can't even hear when your both talking at the same time...
Mom: (Laughing...) He hears us you know
Me: Ohhhh I know!
11:25 Call Sista back. Tell her I think I want to have lunch alone with Mom. We are going to be okay.
Later....
Looking at the plows on the side of the road, she proclaims, in exasperation "Really???...Plows???...already???! It's barely the end of summer!" Catching the wide-eyed look on my face, she says "Uhh the beginning of fall????" Softly, I place my hand on her arm, and say "Mom, it's St Patrick's Day (we've talked about this a few times today...Mini mook was wearing his leprechaun hat and all...) It's only March...really just the end of winter."
I bring her home, she checks the mail (for the third time) and heads into the house. She turns and smiles and blows a kiss....I back out of the driveway and cry.
I lose my Mother a little bit everyday...and it SUCKS!
The day we took the car.
It was a Tuesday, we ambushed her.
After much talk and many months of should we or shouldn't we...we did. We had a family meeting and we confirmed that Mom really shouldn't be driving anymore. She has been seen to do unsafe things, she gets flustered easily, she reaches for the clutch in her automatic, she frequently puts the car in neutral, she was asking for directions to places she knew how to get to......it WAS time. It wasn't easy, but it was time.
My oldest brother and I had been designated the tellee's of the news. THE most Painful day of my life...the look on her face, the sadness in her eyes, I will NOT. FORGET. THIS. EVER. But it was her and Dad who taught us that the right thing is not always the easiest, and boy is that true. The whole "intervention" took about an hour before she broke down and gave in to handing over the keys and agreeing to let my brother leave with the car.
After much talk and many months of should we or shouldn't we...we did. We had a family meeting and we confirmed that Mom really shouldn't be driving anymore. She has been seen to do unsafe things, she gets flustered easily, she reaches for the clutch in her automatic, she frequently puts the car in neutral, she was asking for directions to places she knew how to get to......it WAS time. It wasn't easy, but it was time.
My oldest brother and I had been designated the tellee's of the news. THE most Painful day of my life...the look on her face, the sadness in her eyes, I will NOT. FORGET. THIS. EVER. But it was her and Dad who taught us that the right thing is not always the easiest, and boy is that true. The whole "intervention" took about an hour before she broke down and gave in to handing over the keys and agreeing to let my brother leave with the car.
Subscribe to:
Comments (Atom)